confessions of a bipolar mind

i swallowed a lighthouse,
once 

decorated my body 
with glitter and ink 
to signal out 
my reflection 

let out
a shriek 
into the chasm 
of spells and rituals 

when i spoke 
gold fell from my lips

offered a prayer 
to the tide,
moon rising 
wings of fire 

banishing the shadows
from the dark recesses of 
this room 

find me 
somewhere between 
the paradox 
and the lie 

when you read my poetry
know that you are
stepping into a mind
that steps outside of me 

how do i explain 
the mystery
of a bipolar mind 

to a kingdom 
that doesn’t understand 
that not all poems
rhyme 

this is not
a love story
i would leave me
if i could 

dancing on the edge
of a cliff

20 milligrams 
disintegrate between
my fingers
every night

i learned
when smoke rises
it burns 

like a sage’s 
sage 

medicated 
on a high odyssey 
to sanity 

i am the healed
not the sick 

a little unhinged
but here. 

lh 
feb 2022

the child within

you’ve been here before 
the child within
never forget

the child within
always
remembers

hurt was here
long before we were
to collect the names
of every stranger

whose ever taken our
kindness for
weakness

will you come and play with me?
ride the waves
until they settle my little beating
quivering
bones of milk and honey

be gentle,
my heart still hides wounds
that never bleed

time doesn’t heal all
but it gives us comfort
to think it does
don’t we?

why else would we
praise the rain
when it pours

somersaulting
in puddles that carry waters made of tears

hoping that tomorrow
will carry the weight
of an encyclopedia of a broken heart

relieve the burden of its
weight
volumes upon volumes
onto solid ground

lay flowers on sidewalks
that bear witness to
the pain

shed skins
tossed into the wind
with spirits
and ghosts of our recent past

memories
that testisfy
to the joy

of night skies
and shooting starts
that steal kisses at midnight

and the love

love
wading in typhoons
of butterflies and roses

you’ve been here before
the child within
never forgets

the child within
always
remembers

to heal,
you will cry
a lot

until neptune
washes away your sorrows
in holy waters

that baptize
the blood curdling screams
in the abyss
of apollo’s fire

you will laugh
until you have crow’s feet
for eyes

and the song of achilles
drum up
battles
yet
unsung

love was here
long before we were
to look into the eyes
of every loved one

whose ever held our
hand
leading us back to
ourselves

coming home
to oneself
is like finally having
the homecoming
you were never allowed to have

now,
you stand at the intersect
of what was
and
what could have been

and you realize that
sometimes,
you will break

but oh,
you will mend
the hearts touched by
crimson kings
and demons

because you are here
you have arrived
slinging arrows and bolts
from the thrones of queens

remember,
you are here
the child within
never forgets

the child within in
will thank you

the child within
always
remembers

they
always
do

they. always. remember.

lh
nov 2021

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